Bill O’Reilly is on a
mission.
Single-handedly, he wants to solve the African American Problem.
This actually would be funny,
except that um … it isn’t.
Apparently, O’Reilly has
had it up to here with all the recent
talk about racism against blacks. His position is yeah, racism exists, but the
biggest problem African Americans face is the crumbling of the black family. And
he wants to know why no one except him is speaking up about this. He wants to
know—why haven’t leaders in the black community run promotions and campaigns
urging little black girls to keep their legs closed? (Okay, he actually said, “stop
getting pregnant,” but what I heard was
the thing about the legs.)
Well, you have to give the
man props for courage, I guess. Going on national television and asking young black
girls to stop having babies is not for the faint of heart. Instead, it’s the
quickest way to be accused of being a "super racist," and I’m guessing allegations of O’Reilly wanting
to extinguish the black race can’t be that far behind.
Here’s my problem.
Having children that you
can’t afford and aren’t emotionally equipped to raise is not a good thing, and
it is tearing down segments of the
black community. But, telling women to stop having children also isn’t good, for
a whole host of reasons, not the least of which is—no one’s going to listen to
you.
According to the Centers for Disease Control,
in 2010 nearly 41% of children were born out of wedlock. That’s a pretty big
percentage. So it’s clear that out-of-wedlock birth is a widespread cultural
issue that is in no way limited to the African-American community.
Angelina’s doing it.
Jennifer Hudson’s doing it. Jessica Simpson’s doing it. Heck, who isn’t doing
it?
And so you say, “Well
dear, those women are rich. They can afford to care for their children.”
And that’s when *&^%
starts to hit the fan.
Because a woman would be
well within her rights to respond, “Poor people shouldn't have kids? Are you serious? Money doesn’t
make someone a good parent! And besides, whether I have children is none of
your damn business. You can’t tell people to stop having kids! You stop having kids!”
See what I mean?
(And by the way, at age
sixty-three, some might criticize O’Reilly for having a ten-year-old. Just
putting it out there.)
And I have to say, I
have difficulty reconciling a belief in God with the idea that some children
shouldn’t be/shouldn’t have been born. In fact, I can’t reconcile it.
So here’s what I say.
No, you don’t have to be
rich to have children. I certainly wasn’t/am not.
But if you’re going to
have children, young black ladies and gents, then it is time to man up.
(Gee, I’ve been saying that a lot this week.)
Commit to your partner,
complete your education, and seek employment that will allow you to support
said children. No complaining (at least not prolonged complaining) about what
you don’t have, who won’t let you do what, and how things aren’t fair. We know
shit’s not fair, okay? But you have a child now, so forget all that. If your
family can’t or won’t help, then please avail yourself of the many
agencies—governmental, private, religious, and secular, that are in business to
help you on your way.
This is not the time for
standing on can’ts, because you must. Otherwise, we’re going to continue to
have what we have.
And that’s not good.
Excuse me, but if you have children and you need public funding to care for them, then it IS MY BUSINESS!!! If you can't afford them, don't have them. And if you do have them anyway, don't come whining to me for assistance.
ReplyDeleteDear Anon. I hear you and I don't. People should be responsible for the children they produce, no question. However, I'm not ready to sign up for a society that begrudges kids food to eat and a decent education because their parents have messed up. This is a rich country. We can afford to care more than that.
DeleteAlso, just because you can't afford a child when you have one doesn't mean you'll never be able to afford one. When I got pregnant with my oldest, I was a college student and didn't have health insurance, an apartment, or a husband. But, when I decided to have that child, I knew I'd have to get my crap together. I reached out to campus services and met a wonderful counselor who introduced me to a wonderful OB/GYN. My boyfriend and I got married (with all four parents reluctantly getting on board) and got an apartment. We both finished college and started working. I've never applied for public assistance a day in my life, although if you need it you should.
The problem is not these babies. The problem is the parents and the parents of the parents who aren't providing resources, guidance, and tough love.
I worked for my county's Job and Family Services and I help a mixture of women (of all ethnicities) to recieve assistance for their babies. With that being said, this is not a "black girls" problem, this is a societal problem. And just to add, I have helped women who did not have their own children, but adopted siblings and other family members due to tragedy. I find it offensive that anyone would single out one group of people like that. It is ignorant. However, we have use for people like O'Reilly who continues to nurture his racist mindset. His disfunctional remarks help to keep us aware of prejudism, in the various forms, as it continues to evolve.
Delete-T. Clay
Hi Anon:
DeleteGreat comment about women who have adopted babies in the family. Thanks so much for your work with the county! We need more help and less hot air. (Note to self.)
YES!!!!!!!!!
DeleteHaving kids out of wedlock needs to stop. It hurts the woman, the child and the father in the long run.
ReplyDeletePerhaps, but with a full 38% of all pregnancies unplanned worldwide, that's probably not going to happen.
DeleteThe world will is going to have a bleak future soon. Population has to be checked. Poverty in Africa has definitely got to do with this craze about having babies and babies without caring for them. Now that africans are moving to other parts of the world, they seem to continue this trend. It may sound cruel but has to be done. All females must be medically prevented from having more than two children.
ReplyDeleteOr we could castrate all the men ...
DeleteI find it hard to believe that the government hasn't already made attempts to address the future of overpopulation in the U.S. A single, welfare mother pumping out babies only to abandon them for the State to take care of, should be sterilized. So many Americans already feel this way, but given its sensitivity and violation of women's rights, it may be difficult to enforce.
ReplyDeleteAnd again, I must ask--should we castrate the men too?
DeleteThe hell with American Women!!!!!!
DeleteStop having babies black or white, poor or rich. Please do not be soooo ignorant, your motherf$#@/ing babies are not special other than to you.
ReplyDeleteWow. Way to show your love for humanity.
DeleteTreniqua say she shud be able to have as meny chirrins as she want. An juss cuz yall dont feel like payin fo dare howsin, fute stams an helf ker dat meen yall is raciss. Im on weffer an I got fo kiz an Im fiddin have anuver wun. I downt ker if white folk gotta pay fer um cuz dey got rich fum slabery. So darefo i feel as dough we shult keeps makin mo babies. An i dont ker if i do have fo baby daddys dat downt meen nuffin. Dass juss ower kulcher. Matter of fack i think we shoult git way mo muny fo foo stams dan we gits now. Lassyeer i wayed 320 ancuz dey cut my foo stams im down to 275. Dey tryin starve us.
ReplyDeleteWow. Really. You only weigh 275. Times are tough. Maybe you could shuffle or waddle down to the food bank and stock up for a nice BBQ. That might make you feel better. Maybe you should put up a before and after picture on Gofundme and give the world an oppotunity to help you get that weight back on girl. I feel so guilty as a white person. A sheboon should never get below 300 lbs. in a country as rich as this. Somebody call Sharpton!
ReplyDeleteAnonymous, are you having foolish conversations with yourself again?! You might want to see someone about that.
DeleteThe hell with nappy headed blackwomen!!!!!
DeleteWhat is wrong with you? Have you no sense of self-awareness? Even racists would look at you with disdain because you are infantile.
DeleteShe makes a post filled with intelligent thoughts and opinions (not all with which I agree) and you somehow think that your response filled with insults and irrational emotion is somehow appropriate or reasonable?
I am a black women, single, professional and no children. I agree with Bill O'Reilly. Black women who cannot afford to financially take care of their babies will benefit from strongly reconsidering having babies. I also agree with Bill O'Reilly why aren't the black leaders addressing this issues. Why would a single women with limited income or just poor be some quick to bring another person in this world. Get a higher education, or trade school, start a non profit, be a role model in your community, travel the country, invest and leave legacy to future generations, do something productive and when you are in a better financial situation than consider bringing children in this world. Why have another life struggle? Wake-Up, please.
ReplyDeleteHey Anon, you're making sense, but people rarely have children because it makes sense...
DeleteI live in a black neighborhood and from what I have experienced black women should not be allowed to have children if they are not going to raise them to be proper human beings.
ReplyDeleteFortunately, most of us don't need permission to have children. And while I get your meaning (I think), every parent should strive to raise his or her children into proper human beings. That's not a black thing. I've met plenty of vile human beings, and their parents aren't black.
DeleteBecause it takes a mother and a father to love and to teach a child to do the right things.Most of these African American girls don't even know who the father is. The child has no guidance and ends up with the wrong friends. Thousands of these men end up in prison for life.
ReplyDelete