What Gifts Do You Bring to HR?

I’ve been reading a lot this week about the job market and hiring practices and how to pick the best employees and avoid the worst. And all of this has got me thinking about gifts.

Not gifts that you get for birthdays and special holidays, but the gifts you’re born with. Like mathematical gifts, or the gift of gab, or the gift of empathy, or what have you.

And the reason I’ve been thinking about this is that it seems to me that sometimes we are reluctant to recognize gifts and their importance in doing a bang-up job.

Marcus Buckingham and Donald Clifton, authors of Now, Discover Your Strengths get the idea of gifts. They call them “talents,” but same difference. The point is that all of us have the ability to naturally do some things better than some other things, and these abilities are ours to discover and development, but they can’t be manufactured.

In particular, I’ve been thinking about this concept in relation to HR, because it seems to me that there are still far too many people who think that anybody can do HR, and it’s just not true.

I know because I went through a string of HR personnel who were terrible at it. They either lacked the detail orientation, or the critical thinking skills, or the analytical skills, or the head for employment law concepts, or something. And these were smart people.  And it wasn’t until I started complaining to a wiser friend of mine about some task the most-recent hire had been unable to perform—“I don’t understand why _____ can’t get this right. It’s so simple!”—and my friend saying, “I don’t know Crystal, its sounds complicated to me” (and this man was a veteran leadership trainer studying for his PhD) that the light bulb went off.  Yes, the task was easy for me, because of my abilities. Oh …

And that’s when I started paying real close attention to traits, even testing for them during the hiring process. And after that, I started hiring people who were right for HR.

So what am I saying? I’m saying two things. First, I completely agree with Buckingham and Clifton when they write that it is not true that anyone can learn to be competent in anything. Second, if you’re in HR and do it well, don’t let anyone tell you that it’s an accident. It’s not. 

Which isn’t to say that people who try their hand at HR and aren’t very good at it can’t do other things fabulously well. They probably can. As I said, everyone has abilities. But it’s completely false to assert that because way too many people fall into HR and do “okay,” anybody can do it really well. Nope. As with most anything, these guys just make it look easy.

So, what are your HR gifts? 

More Reasons to Handle Your Stress

According to the scientists, stress kills.

Stress affects our brain chemistry and our neurological system and makes us gain weight in all the wrong places, like around the belly.

Some scientists say that the lower your place in the social hierarchy, the more stress you’ll have. That doesn’t sound terribly shocking, considering some of the difficulties of being poor. But what is shocking is that these studies weren’t conducted on the poorest of the poor, they involved middle class folks in middle-class jobs making their middle-class widgets. Apparently, being a subordinate sucks.

Even more surprisingly, some studies suggest that stress passed on in utero from mother to child can have life-long effects, making these adults more sensitive to stress and more prone to depression and other mental health issues—and now it’s official. Your mother is indeed the cause of all your problems.

(Look, I’m no doctor, but how do these folks know that the children aren’t genetically prone to depression or whatever and weren’t necessarily subjected to stress in the womb that caused their adult maladies? Perhaps this is a fine point, but it’s a point nonetheless.)

Regardless, I don’t need to be convinced that individuals subjected to high levels of stress for long periods are likely to experience physical and psychological effects as a result. Been there, done that. Anecdotally, I find that sometimes people don’t even realize how much they’ve been affected by stress until the symptoms are pretty dramatic. And, again, if we’re talking about the workplace, this is yet another reason for leaders to think twice about turning a blind eye to incivility and all its attendant costs.

Many people have written much about how to beat stress at work but my favorite list so far comes from Hannah Nicholas from Money NZ (New Zealand), of all places. Nicholas recommends laughter, exercise, time away from work, adequate sleep, and if all else fails, another job. I just find her list to be very practical. Other writers recommend trying to think of work as “just work” or “just a game,” but if you’re not built like that I can’t see that advice helping.

I’d add to Nicholas’ list prayer and helping others, which often takes our focus off us and our stress.

Whatever you do, do something. Because as I said the science is in—stress is no joke, and while we seem to know this, we’re still trying to do fifteen things at once while disdaining leisure.

And according to the scientists, it's making us sick and fat.

To All the Clients Who’ll Never Hire Me—My Sincere Apologies

My brother and I were having lunch and discussing my business plans (he’s my informal business manager/muse) and while taking a look at my Linkedin profile he shook his head slowly and said “I don’t know Crystal. Your profile lists your blog right there. Are you sure you want to do that?”

A strange question to ask a writer, no?

But I knew where he was coming from. I cover a lot of ground on my blog. I talk about my faith, I talk about my family, I talk about race relations, and I’m very vocal about my disdain for employers who choose dysfunction over function. It might be a little too much information for certain prospective clients. Especially some of my prospective clients, because in addition to being a writer, I’m a HR consultant, and it’s hard to imagine a more conservative profession than HR. Except maybe a banker … or a corporate lawyer … or a priest … okay, fine. You get my point.

So I understand. But I look at it like this. I did not decide to assume all the risks of starting and running a business, such as paying my own health insurance, paying my own life insurance, investing my savings, working all hours of the day and night and weekends, and enduring my friends’ questions about when I’m going to get a “real job,” so that I could twist myself into some damn pretzel, trying to hide parts of myself I no longer care to keep hidden, all to satisfy someone else’s jacked up notion of who I’m supposed to be. Been there. Done that.

Good to eat, not to emulate.

I worship my lord and savior Jesus Christ. Is that a problem for you? So sorry. I’m a black woman who is not happy about racism or sexism occurring in the world around me. Does my lack of love for racist and sexist behavior make you uncomfortable? Again, so sorry. I also have no love for irresponsible corporate bullies—especially those in leadership, because regular folks who come to work wanting nothing more than to do their jobs get a bunch of crap instead under this leadership’s watch. And so again, if my ire about this issue bothers you, I’m very sorry. Really, I am.

But it strikes me that it’s a very strange world in which someone who expresses disapproval of behavior that hurts others or her love for a supreme being to whom she owes the very air she breathes should be shunned for these beliefs. Of course, it is a very strange world indeed.

And I thought about all this for a few seconds before answering my brother, and then I said—

“Yes, I am.” 

Because I know two things. The first is—that God I mentioned earlier? I need to trust him to send me clients who either don’t care about all that stuff I just mentioned or who will actually like me for it. The second is—a writer can’t help anyone by pretending not to believe anything or to feel anything. I don’t care if I’m writing about “managing up,” an employment law that just passed in Jersey, or how to save money at the movies. Playing it too safe is a disservice to my God and my humanity, and it’s boring to boot. So unless I’m writing to deliberately offend (which I don’t) I’m going to insist on expressing who I am.

So sorry.

This post was part of a link party at makealivingwriting.com.

HR 101: Don't Ask Me This Question, Please

There are few pleasures in life I enjoy more than a meaty conversation with individuals of differing viewpoints.

That said, there is one topic of conversation that drives me nuts, and it centers on this question—

Is HR an advocate for the employee or the employer? 

I hate this question. It seriously sets my teeth on edge when I hear it.

Here’s why.

The Question Seems Determined to Perpetuate a Divide

Who says that HR has to choose sides? Why is this an acceptable proposition? Where else in the organization is someone called to be an advocate of one group at the expense of the other? So what that employers and employees sometimes have conflicting interests—so do customers and employers. If a sales person is an advocate for his customer, is he operating outside the interests of his employer? Of course not. So, why do we keep asking this question of HR? Instead, why not ask a better question—what can HR do to balance the interests of employer and employee? Which brings me to …

The Question Gives HR an Excuse to Do a Crappy Job

You say, “Oh, that sounds good, but HR is paid by the employer, not the employee.” Yes, and the sales person is paid by the employer and not the customer. Again, does that give the sales person license to not solve the customer’s problem? On the flip side, if HR is all about “helping” employees, then there’s no reason for HR to thoughtfully consider the effects of any employee request. Can you use bereavement leave to attend the funeral of your ex-wife’s cousin’s husband? Why sure, employee! You have a need, and we’re here to help you! This is bad HR, people. Bad HR.

The Question Makes it Okay for Employers to Behave Irresponsibly

If HR’s job is simply to “take the employer’s side” then there’s no reason for the employer to consider any information from HR before making a decision. So go ahead employer and misclassify your employees, ignore that bully, promote that incompetent into another department, and pay Betty less for doing the same job as Joe. Apparently HR is just here to push your paper and effect your bad business decisions.

The Question Gives HR Detractors a Reason to Diss the Profession

Seriously HR, you don’t have the critical thinking skills, maturity, or business sense to solve a problem based on its own merits? You don’t have the wisdom or the courage to tell that misguided employee who says his boss is “harassing” him that his manager has every right and a responsibility to set and enforce standards? Or to tell your employer that the Director of Temper Tantrums in department X is causing a serious morale issue, and you know she’s brilliant, but folks and productivity are suffering?

Please, don’t get me wrong. At the end of the day, the employer pays the bills and the employer will decide the type of HR department it gets.

But my question is—what type of HR practitioner are YOU? Your employer doesn’t get to make that decision.

So forget about sides and instead recommend the very best solutions you can devise with the information you have on hand. And let knowledge, skill, compassion, wisdom, tact, and maturity guide your decision making—not some simplistic notion of "us" versus "them." 

Reflections on the Land of the Un-Dead

“Lord I believe. Help my unbelief” (Mark 9:24) has been popping into my mind a lot lately.

This cry is uttered by a man after he’s asked Jesus to heal his mute son. When making his request, the man says to Jesus, “But if you can do anything, take pity on us and help us!” (Mark 10:22) And Jesus responds, “IF you can? All things are possible to him who believes” (Mark 10:23), which is when the father cries, “I do believe. Help my unbelief.”

I know I shouldn’t be, but I’m always surprised when I hear a nonbeliever say something to the effect that she thinks Christians are lost puppy dogs desperately lapping after a make-believer master.

Here’s an example. In response to a news report about a Cardinal’s comment that the Catholic church should adopt a more loving stance toward homosexuals, “Veronica25” said (in part), “Now they should admit that there is no God and that this whole religion crap was made up to give people guidance in the early years. By the way, Happy Zombie Jesus Day, everybody.”

I can’t speak for every Christian, but I can tell you that I’m certainly no “zombie” for Christ. Would that were even possible! It’d sure be easier. Because contrary to the beliefs of many, following Christ is not an anti-intellectual endeavor. Not at all. Christ instructs his children to follow him with their whole “heart, soul, and mind” (Matthew 22:37), and trying to get these three in alignment is not without difficulty and it sure ain’t automatic. It takes conscious effort, the work of the Spirit, and a willingness to pray the prayer of this poor father in Mark 9:24.

I should know. Since leaving my job and beginning on this journey of reinvention, I’ve had moments of doubt, frustration, discouragement, confusion, and more. Heck, I’ve had days. And understand that I could testify for hours about what Jesus has done for me, going back years. But sometimes I’m like Janet Jackson wanting to know “What have you done for me lately, God?” keeping in mind that by “lately” I mean within the last two minutes. The truth is that I am frail and weak and can easily forget, without stubborn reminder, everything that has gone before.

So like the mute boy’s father, I must cry, “Lord I believe. Help my unbelief!” and this is a daily struggle. There’s nothing remotely zombie-like about it. Trust me.

But God is gracious, and he knows how weak I am. And so he provides signs and tiny wonders, lots of them, all the time.

But still.

Lord I believe. Help my unbelief!